I’ve been in a relationship for three years and we just became friends on Facebook last year. Even before doing that, a discussion was had (I think he just needed time to remove any old pics of his ex lol). Although his social media presence has always been very minimal, he will tag me in posts occasionally and whenever I do post a picture or anything about him, I let him know. Navigating social media is already crazy, but it’s definitely different when you’re in a relationship. Here are some things to keep in mind when you’re in a relationship and on social media sites.
1. If you’re fighting, don’t make a status about it. In a world where people love to see others drama unfold, save yourself the trouble. Facebook, Snapchat, Twitter, etc. aren’t the places to share your momentary disdain for your mate. You’ll make up in an hour, but your friends and family will more than likely still be upset with that person. Not to mention, someone will have a screenshot and share the post to other people. Even if you delete it, it will not be forgotten.
2. In relation to my first point, don’t solicit relationship advice from your social media followers. This brings outsiders into your relationships and gives them an idea of the issues you may be having. It’s fine to have a trustworthy friend to confide in or ask for advice, but don’t take your concerns to the masses.
3. Don’t be that couple that overshares. I’m sure we all love to see little glimpses of our friends and families’ relationships, but we don’t need to know everything. Most people are already happy that you’re happy. We just don’t need to know what his/her breath smells like in the morning or when and where they clip their toenails. Less is more in those instances.
4. Understand that your mate had friends and relationships with other people before you were in the picture. If you’re the jealous type, being on your partner’s social media may not be a good idea. We all have friends of the opposite sex and may interact with them online. Don’t get upset every time a woman likes one of his pictures or she has more male friends than women friends. If you don’t know if this is a friend, classmate or family member, don’t go off the deep end just because.
Also from 32 Letter:
5. Joint accounts are really confusing. I know people have them for their own reasons, maybe you have a business together or it’s where you share all your family things. Many on the outside may automatically assume “trust issues” exist when they see a couple sharing a joint account. I get confused when I interact with couples with a joint account. Who controls the profile? Who’s responding to my post? How do I know who I’m talking to if I reach out to you in a message? You are both individuals and should be able to handle your own individual profiles. If by chance there is some level of distrust in your relationship, social media may not be the place for either of you until those issues are resolved.
6. Do not disrespect your mate or your relationship. There’s a thin line between being friendly and being grimy. Yes, we’re all going to like other peoples pictures and possibly even comment on them. But, sliding in DM’s and ogling over someone else shows a high level of disrespect to your partner. If someone else happens to slide in your inbox, help them slide back out by letting them know you aren’t interested. There are people who don’t care about your relationship and will see just how far they can get you to go. Don’t give them the attention they are seeking and risk causing problems for yourself or your relationship.
I’ve never been one who believed social media is the cause of problems in relationships. It is how you conduct yourself on social media that can cause issues in your relationship. It is simple to be cognizant of what you are doing and how you are representing yourself online.