When life gives you lemons, do you make lemonade or cut a slice to put into a glass of half full — or empty — water? Throughout our lives, we cannot escape making decisions. These decisions are not always moments during our adulting period (ages 25 to 40), we have been making decisions from the moment of birth. However, as we get older, decisions can become detrimental if you don’t take a moment to weigh out your options before considering to say “Yes.”
Depending on your career path, you may have a moment where you feel like you are stuck in a mundane rut and want a change. Maybe you don’t have a career, but your job is just a 9-to-5 and you’re looking for more out of life besides collecting a check. So you spruce up your resume, hit all the job hunting websites and start applying to positions you may or may not be qualified for.
Or you make calls within your network to let your people know you’re interested in hearing about new opportunities outside of your company. Months past and you finally get a call or email requesting to schedule an interview. Less than two weeks later, you’re given an offer, but you’re not 100% sure this is the position you want anymore.
- Does this position advance your career?
- Will extra energy become a requirement?
- What’s the commute like?
- Does the thought of more or fewer responsibilities interest you?
- If your current job gives you a counter offer to increase your salary, is it worth staying?
- Why did you start looking for a new job in the first place?
Moving: Renting or Owning
When you’re in your 20s or 30s, living at home with your parent(s) can be a bust or amazing. Yes, you can save a lot more money after paying your cell phone, student loan(s), credit card(s), transportation, etc. bills — including money you should you slide to your parents to help out with utilities — but your independence urge is itching the middle of your back. You need and want to get out. The housing market right now is not in favor of any working class adult, let alone a young adult just getting started in their adulthood.
- Do you have a 401k plan to dip into?
- Do you qualify for a first-time homeowner loan?
- If something breaks, do you have finances to repair something on your own? Remember there’s no landlord to call, YOU are the landlord.
- Would you live with a roommate (s)?
- If renting, have you saved enough for first and last month’s rent, a security deposit, utilities, groceries, and some furniture?
- If your parents own their home, would you rather stay there and help them pay down on the mortgage?
Just because you are dating someone for more than one year does not mean he or she is the one. Just because you are dating someone for more than five years means he or she is the one.
I know this may sound crazy, but the amount of time you are in a relationship with someone does not equal husband or wife material. There are a lot of observations you must make during those years and months you are dating to put into your back pocket. Mind you, I put a possible “s” by the word “proposal” above because your first proposal does not have to be your last.
- Do you consider each other in your life plans?
- What are their spending habits?
- Do either of you want children? If you or your partner already has children, what’s the plan with bringing you into their world?
- Willing to relocate?
- How does he or she treat their family and why?
- Is he or she a “yes” person or someone who gives you a realistic perspective?
After all that you may feel like giving up.
In the end, it’s your life and you have to make decisions on your own. Just make sure they’re the right ones for you.