Ever wish you had someone to tell you what pregnancy was like before and while going through it? In this weekly column, we check in with an expectant mother — who’s previously suffered loss. She’ll take us along a journey of endless doctor’s appointments and questions from the outside world — all while keeping it a secret until she’s ready. Follow her journey of highs and lows during this special time. Her name? That’s to be revealed in due time.
So, during one sunny afternoon of unnecessary bickering, my boyfriend suggested that I was pregnant.
“No I am not!” I half-way positively declared.
I just felt under a lot of stress and had bad PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder), I reminded him.
The more I thought about it, I realized that I was having random cravings and my period was late…but NAHHHH.
I can’t be…could I?
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It was weighing on me heavily, so I immediately bought a pregnancy test. I went to the 99 cent store because I didn’t want to spend a lot of money and be disappointed by a test that I just knew was negative. Off to the dollar store I went.
I waited eagerly on the line and grew impatient because I felt like every customer had a million items in their baskets — it was torture.
I got my test and rushed home. I was so anxious that I forgot to actually pee on the dropper. Saving the last bit that I had left in me, I took the test.
The negative line popped up instantly –”See I knew it! I wasn’t pregnant,” I thought to myself.
But then, a few minutes later, another faint line popped up. Can this be accurate? Umm is this positive? This isn’t enough proof.
Back to the store I go!
Now I needed TWO tests. I took one more inexpensive test and sure enough, it was positive. Next, I tried First Response (the one that cost $15). Not even two minutes in (even though it felt like an hour) a “YES+” popped up.
I sat in our car in the Target parking lot for at least 30 minutes. Life just got real. I picked up my boyfriend from work. I contemplated just blurting it out or surprising him the entire way.
We finally reached home and I beelined for the bathroom. He didn’t think anything of it, but little did he know I was about to change his whole life with the news I had.
I pulled out the positive test and received a gasp and the warmest, longest embrace followed. That warmed my heart and made all my fears immediately disappear. I knew at that moment…everything was going to be okay.
The real journey was about to begin.
Image via Parents magazine