It’s been 23 days and I feel like I’ve received 15 minutes of sleep in total. I’m pushing myself to get my body back, so I can help out around the house. I knew c-sections were hard, but this…MAN! I feel like my lower half had been detached and glued back on by a kindergartner. Keep walking, they said… it will get better, they said. Now I understand why women were designed to bear children because men simply could NEVER! This is hard, but every time I look over at Nuri, it’s like an instant reminder from God.
This is indeed my LAST baby unless I strike rich and can get a surrogate. I can’t tell you the future, but honey I just don’t see it! Some people are able to enjoy their pregnancy and have it as normal as possible, but unfortunately, that wasn’t my situation.
Since we have been home it’s been endless bonding, sleepless nights, and working on the big task of trying to breastfeed. Nuri is a night owl who doesn’t play bout her sleep! She is impossible to wake up during the day to feed or break her sleep routine, so we just conform and try to get on her schedule.
Breastfeeding is one of the most painful things ever. I’ve had three visits with the lactation specialist and I still haven’t gotten it right. I want to give up ten times a day, but if it’s better for her and I have milk…I’ll keep at it! Anything for your kids right?!? I’ll keep you posted on how I’m doing with nursing.
On the flip side of things, I can say this is an amazing experience. Watching your creation grow is like…*deep sigh*…indescribable. I’m so just head over heels for this kid. She’s already had two visits with her pediatrician who we just love! Her doctor is attentive, gentle, and answers all of our annoying first-time parent questions thoroughly.
Sleep has been a non-existent activity. Everyone tells us to sleep when she sleeps, but it’s borderline impossible. We have to clean bottles, the house, change diapers, remember to eat and TRY to still acknowledge each other.
We jump out the bed out for every coo and sneeze she makes, but are trying not to spoil her. It’s a lot they don’t tell you in the parenting books. When that baby is here and you have to figure things out in real life, it’s a very different story.
Also from 32 Letter:
Whoa! What Just Happened? A Birth Story
Postpartum depression kind of did a drive-by with me, I’d say. I think baby blues is having the strongest emotional effect on me. For the first week, I cried daily. No legit reason besides I’m exhausted, hurting and I have no idea what is going on inside of my body besides trying to heal.
I’ve been very transparent about my journey (sometimes too transparent), so hopefully, I didn’t freak out any expecting moms, but I’d be doing a huge disservice to you if I dressed up my truth.
If I had to give anyone advice about postnatal care and the experience, here is what I’d say:
1. Pray every day and every time you think about praying…pray again!
2. Hire a doula and join support groups
3. Ask for help so you can rest, eat, and have a minute to yourself
4. Talk to your partner about how you feel, how you are adjusting, things you may need, your grievances. (Don’t keep this to yourself, you will explode!)
5. It’s okay to cry and feel out of it…just don’t get stuck there.
6. Get dressed up and make yourself feel good regardless if you’re going to Target or taking out the trash.
7. Hydrate and keep taking your vitamins: you will need all the energy you can get for that little energizer of a baby
8. Enjoy it: Time goes so fast, so don’t try to be a perfectionist. You’ll miss out on all the fun.
