Our conversations as a culture and as families about death are extremely limited. Whether it’s a discussion about estate planning or the wishes of a loved one who is terminally sick, it’s a slippery slope that can mist up feelings of sadness and anxiety. We know man is not meant to be immortal, but the reality of that is still scary — especially if you have the role of being a parent.
Just the other day my 14-month old was sliding across the floor and ran into the side of my TV stand. I swooped him up and showered him with kisses for a minute straight – really, it was the buffer time I needed to work up the courage to see if he had a bruise, a knot, or a cut. Thankfully, it was just a small bump that disappeared within a few hours. Being a parent means you are fearful a good 95% of your day.
In the news over the last two weeks, we’ve seen instances of sudden death of a parent in model Kim Porter and in Sutton Tennyson, Angela Simmons’ ex-fiancé. Both situations hit me like a ton of bricks. Upon reading the news about Tennyson I sent my son’s father a text and waited for a response to make sure he was alright. With Porter, I instantly thought of my mom who was up in the air on a plane headed to vacation across the country. I feel vulnerable from all sides.
My son just learned how to give me kisses. Sort of. He pulls my face close to his and leaves a glob of drool on my cheek. I don’t want to imagine not having that feeling anymore.
But eventually, the clock winds down and our time on this earth will be up. I think what’s important is to make a meaningful impact while you’re here. That doesn’t mean promotions, cars, and new businesses. It’s making a difference in the lives of your loved ones every day. Celebrate their birthdays, Valentines Day, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Just be there.
How do you cope with being anxious about mortality?
Also from 32 Letter: